Creating Goals That Motivate and Inspire

This month we are examining the art of creating goals. In this first of two articles on the topic, we look more closely at the key components of creating “goals that feel like gifts.”

If you haven’t already, read our October Blog which will give you the foundation for the goal-setting process we discuss in our two articles this month. Our aim is to raise the bar on goal setting by helping coaches and clients create inspiring goals. We’re talking about goals that give your clients goosebumps when they read them and when achieved, truly feel like incredible gifts!

Converting a client’s broad aspirations into powerful actionable goals requires two major steps before you or they ever set pen to paper.

1. The first is a deep exploration of the client’s desires, exploring the emotions, experiences, and beliefs that fuel these aspirations, which we address in this article.
2. The second step, which will be addressed in our next article, is imagining and visualizing what could be possible if relevant and inspiring goals are set and achieved.

Exploring the client’s desires involves reflective questioning, exercises, and discussions that delve into the client\’s values, past experiences, and future desires. This deep exploration is essential for understanding who the client is and guiding them towards transformative change. Here are some steps and techniques you might employ:

Build Trust: Clients want to feel safe, understood, and supported while sharing their emotions, past experiences, and deeply held beliefs with you. Though it takes time to build this level of trust, there are basic steps you can take to set the tone for a trusting relationship from the get-go.

• Be Present: During coaching sessions, be fully engaged. Avoid checking the time, looking at your phone, or appearing distracted.
• Be Authentic: Be genuine in your interactions. Clients can often sense when someone is being insincere.
• Non-Judgmental Approach: Ensure your client feels that they can express themselves without fear of judgment.
• Self-Disclosure (when appropriate): Sharing a personal story or experience without overshadowing the client\’s story can help build trust.
• Cultural and Gender Sensitivity: Be aware of and respect cultural, personal, and other differences. Demonstrate an understanding or willingness to understand their background and perspective.

Active Listening: One of the most important skills in every aspect of coaching is active listening, a skill we learn and practice throughout our careers. Listening without judgment and giving full attention to the client helps in understanding what is being said, how it\’s being said, and what might be lying beneath the surface.

Active listening is essential when exploring your client’s aspirations more deeply. For example, hearing your client say, “I should do this …” or “I should do that…” may be a sign that the client is creating goals from a sense of obligation rather than desire. Or you might sense a subtle shift in tone when the client talks about a dream they have for the future. Perhaps you pick up on joy, hesitancy, fear, and other clues that suggest you dig deeper. Active listening also requires reflective feedback: Sometimes, clients aren\’t aware of their feelings until they hear someone else articulate them. Rephrasing what you heard the client say often provides them with a much-needed level of clarity.

Strengths Assessment: A strength assessment can be an invaluable tool for a coach and client to explore potential goals and aspirations. Strengths provide insights into a client\’s innate talents, preferences, and capacities, and understanding these can illuminate paths to their goals and dreams. A strength assessment can help in the following ways:

• Identify Natural Abilities: By understanding a client\’s innate strengths, you can guide your clients toward goals and aspirations that align with their natural abilities. This often results in more fulfilling and sustainable outcomes.
• Build Confidence: Recognizing and leveraging one\’s strengths can boost self-confidence. When individuals recognize what they\’re naturally good at, they often feel more empowered to pursue larger goals.
• Uncover Hidden Aspirations: Clients may be unaware of what they truly want until they recognize their strengths. For instance, someone with a strength in communication might disclose an underlying desire to become a public speaker or writer.
• Facilitate Goal Selection: For clients unsure as to which direction to take, understanding their strengths can offer the clarity necessary to align goals with their true selves.
• Deepen Self-awareness: Deeper self-awareness is crucial for any transformative journey. The more clients understand themselves, the more effectively they can define and pursue their aspirations.
• Reframe Limiting Beliefs: Recognizing strengths can challenge and reframe limiting beliefs. If a client sees themselves as ineffective in an area, discovering they have related strengths can shift their perspective.

Incorporating a strength assessment into the coaching process not only provides a concrete tool for exploration but also offers a positive and empowering lens through which clients can view themselves. It shifts the focus from what\’s \”wrong\” or \”lacking\” to what\’s strong and potent, creating a positive foundation for exploration and growth. Please check out the “Additional Resources’ at the end of this article for some widely available strengths assessments.

Uncover Limiting Beliefs: Uncovering limiting beliefs is an important step in the deep exploration that should precede goal setting. Delve into these beliefs, their origins, and their impact on the client’s successes and failures. Exploring and challenging these beliefs can lead to major breakthroughs.

More importantly, if limiting beliefs are not uncovered and dealt with early on they can derail your client’s goals down the road. If a client seems resistant to exploring certain areas, acknowledge this resistance and gently inquire about its origins. Sometimes, resistance can be a signpost pointing toward a potential client breakthrough. We’ll address how to reframe limiting beliefs in more detail in our next article.

Clarify Values: Knowing what values drive a client can offer significant insights into their motivations making this an essential step in the goal-setting process. If a client were to create a goal in conflict with one of their values, there is a very good chance the goal will not be met as there will be no motivation to work on the goal.

We suggest you conduct a Values List Sort, a popular exercise used by coaches to help clients clarify their core values.

Introduction: Provide your client with a list of 30-50 values, depending on the depth and breadth you want for the exercise. Numerous lists of varying lengths can be found on the Internet. Explain that the purpose of the exercise is to help them clarify what they believe is most important in their life.

Initial Sort: Ask your client to go through the list and…

1. Circle the values that are most important to them
2. Cross out the values they deem as unimportant
3. Leave unmarked any values they are uncertain about

This stage is done quickly. Encourage clients not to overthink their choices.

Refinement:

• Ask the client to review the values they circled and choose the 10 they find most important by circling them a second time.
• Have them review the values they indicated as undecided. Are any of these values more important than the 10 they chose? If so, have them narrow the list to no more than 10 values.

Discussion: Although the value-sorting process is useful in itself, the real value is often in the interview that follows. You can find out more about the person’s core values by asking open questions and utilizing reflective listening. This process can strengthen your understanding of the client and teach you much about their guiding principles for living.

• Discuss the top values. Why are they important? How do they manifest in the client’s life?
• Explore any surprises or insights. Were there values they thought would be a top priority but weren\’t? Or vice versa?
• Discuss how these clarified values might influence the individual\’s decisions, behaviors, and goals.

Wrap Up and Reflection: Encourage the participant to reflect on this exercise. They might want to journal about it or consider how they can more actively incorporate these values into their daily life as well as their future goals.

When embarking on the journey of goal setting, it is crucial to recognize that the process goes far beyond quickly jotting down a few personal objectives. The first critical step, as we\’ve explored in this article, involves delving deep into the client\’s desires, unearthing the emotions, experiences, and beliefs that underpin their aspirations. Through trust-building, active listening, strengths assessment, and the illumination of core values, we pave the way for transformative change. By investing time and care in this initial exploration, we set the stage for goals that resonate on a profound level, ones that evoke genuine excitement and ultimately feel like invaluable gifts.

The journey continues in our next article, where we will venture into the realm of imagining and visualizing the boundless possibilities that lie ahead with sound and inspiring goals. Watch for our second article this month on step two in the goal-setting process “Vision Creation.” Better yet, sign up here and have it delivered straight to your inbox.

Thanks for reading.

Additional resources:

THE goal-setting resource and workbook: Stop Shoulding On Yourself: 5 Steps to Create Goals That Feel Like Gifts

Your guide to coaching at a deeper level: The Passionate Coach, A Practical Guide To The Art Of Transformational Coaching.

Become a Certified Best Year Yet Coach. Learn our proven coaching process that leaves clients feeling confident, inspired, and motivated to act.

Strengths and Values Assessments:

• CliftonStrengths (formerly StrengthsFinder 2.0): Developed by Gallup, this tool identifies a person\’s top 34 talent themes and provides personalized insights based on decades of research.
• VIA Character Strengths: This free assessment focuses on 24 character strengths, such as wisdom, courage, and humanity. It\’s rooted in positive psychology research.
• Strengths Profile (formerly Realise2): Created by Cappfinity, this tool assesses 60 strengths based on performance, energy, and use, categorizing them into realized strengths, unrealized strengths, learned behaviors, and weaknesses.
• MAPP (Motivational Appraisal of Personal Potential): A career assessment tool that provides insights into an individual\’s motivations, preferences, and natural abilities.
• The Hogan Personality Inventory (HPI): While primarily a personality assessment, the HPI offers insights into strengths as they pertain to leadership, relationships, and decision-making.
• High5Test: A free strengths test that aims to uncover what you naturally do best and offers insights into how to maximize potential by focusing on your strengths.